Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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