The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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