Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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