The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
