yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
