Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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