She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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