Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
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He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
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He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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