Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
