there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
