singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
