So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
