I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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