$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize