Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
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Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
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I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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