ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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