I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Randomize
