i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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