i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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