Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize