Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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