I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize