Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
