david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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