i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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