How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
