I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
