What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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