What a fucking waste of an outfit
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
