would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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