I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
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