She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
