like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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