Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
