Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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