i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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