i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
