At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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