who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
