Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
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Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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