Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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