six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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