Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize