Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
