She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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