We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
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a search helicopter?!
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
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We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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