someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize