need another drink. this is the easiest way
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
