he puts the penis in happiness.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
