Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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