If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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